Well my 12 weeks is up and I am back to work. Side note/a topic for later, 12 weeks is not enough time. California benefits suck.
My first day back was perfect. It could not have gone smoother. I realize now it’s because I did a half day and there was no pressure for either of us. My first full day back was a different story. My mom called me because my little buddy was screaming at the top of his lungs and wouldn’t take a bottle. My dad called me back 20 minutes later because little buddy was still screaming. My baby had never cried before that. He is a genuinely happy baby, in my arms and on my boob only as it turned out. Day three went better but he still cried throughout the day and that breaks my heart.
So for the second night in a row, operating on fumes, I sit with my baby permanently attached to my boob. I know this phase will pass and that he will be fine but I feel horrible.
Ps pumping every two hours at work is a laborious chore. Worth it but hard.