FET#3 -7dp6dt (4-11-11)

I’m posting this now because I wasn’t really ready to share when I had my FET done.  I like to keep the suspense alive, privately :-). 

0dp6dt (4-4-11)

Transferred 1 good blast and 1 good/fair blast.  They were very ecstatic at the quality and the thaw but that’s not saying much since they seemed like that the last 3 times as well.  I think everything went smoothly.  For some reason I felt like my Dr. seemed a little unsure of himself, why I don’t know but I saw the picture of my uterus with the white glowing spots and the embryologist cleared the catheter so here’s to hoping.  Did some acupuncture right before my transfer this time, which was a first, popped a valium, laid on my back for 30 minutes, hubs drove me home, ate my Rubio’s kids meal bean and cheese burrito with a delicious churro then passed out.  Spent the rest of the day/night lounging.  That is pretty much our routine every time.  I’m superstitious that way J.

1dp6dt (4-5-11)

My clinic no longer requires bed rest so I lounged until noon, then two errands.  It is so hard for me to stay put and now with no restrictions, I can’t help myself but to walk around and do things.  I totally took it easy though.  I know it is too early but I have no symptoms whatsoever.  The hardest part for me is, I have this thing called a pregnancy tumor (sounds scarier than it is) aka pyogenic granuloma that forms on the inside of my lip during pregnancy.  I’m told that it will mostly likely occur every time I get pregnant.  It formed the first time I got pregnant through IVF but we didn’t find out what it was until after I delivered and then had it removed.  With my 2nd FET, it came back about 24-48 hours after my transfer.  It wasn’t until day 4 or 5 that I said to my husband that maybe this FET worked since that bump was coming back.  However, the bump slowly started to shrink back down by my beta and I knew that it was a chemical pregnancy before I even went in.  I was right.  So of course I keep waiting for that stupid bump to start coming in.  Started Lovenox tonight and dangit that stuff stings like a mother.  This time they decided to start me on it the day after my transfer instead of after a BFP.  Totally wishing they didn’t since it’s all experimental and it hurts like hell.  Oh well.  I’d stand on my head for 3 days straight if guaranteed me a BFP.

2dp6dt (4-6-11)

So far no bump.  I’m starting to freak myself out that it didn’t work.  Damn that stupid bump.  I mean of all the symptoms to get, why on earth does mine have to be a stupid bump that forms so soon.  I would rather not know anything until 7-10 days.  I mean this bump has shown up twice like clockwork so unless it forms by the end of today, I’m pretty much writing this FET off and preparing for my third IVF, possibly with a new RE.  Exploring options never hurts.  So of course I said to myself that this time I would not spend every waking hour scouring the internet for those who took an HPT and got a BFP 3dpt or trying to find symptoms this early but I did.  Damn!  I stopped and decided to write instead.  I hope this helps.  I usually test around day 7 or 8 so five more days to go.  Oh cruddy thing is, if I test on day 8 it will be my anniversary.  This year my b-day and v-day were ruined by my failed IVF and this past x-mas/new years was ruined by my chemical pg.  I just can’t win.

3dp6dt (4-7-11)

Still no bump.  I keep feeling, looking, feeling, looking but nothing.  The only thing I have now is a stabbing pain in my right boob that started last night and was still there when I woke up this morning.  Now my first thought was oh pushups.  Well I haven’t done any pushups since Sunday so that’s not it.  Lifting.  Nope fat chance, not allowed to work-out right now.  Hmmm.  I did get really bad breast pain during my first pregnancy but not until around the 5th or 6th week so I think it is too early for that.  Yes it could be the drugs but see my other post, “I feel nothing” because I highly doubt that it’s the drugs.  So I keep waiting and drowning my sorrows in a delicious chocolate donut. 

My aching but not sore boobs are driving me insane.  The non-existent bump inside my mouth is telling me this FET did not work however, my aching boobs is a sign I have not had since my first pregnancy so now what.  I’ve put in so many calls today to get some answers to my pregnancy mouth tumor and the consensus is, it will show up every time and there is nothing I can do to prevent it from coming back.  So with that said, I have to continue thinking it did not work and I guess the aching boobs are a side effect of the estrogen or progesterone. 

4dp6dt (4-8-11)

I don’t even know what I felt today as work was crazy and I tried to keep my mind off of everything.  I do know that I still have no symptoms.  Although I think the bump might be popping up.  I feel nauseous but I think that is just from eating like crap today.  Since I am pretty positive this didn’t work, I am planning several trips next month.  Backpacking with my dad into the Grand Canyon.  A good Rim to Rim hike will make some of my misery go away.  I think I will also have to bite the bullet and go visit my brother and his new born twins (yeah pregnant right out the gate and with twins no less).  And then to MO to visit some family.  I’ve been putting off all these trips but I guess now is the time to get it over with.  Trying to remain hopeful but I’m also realistic and know my body all too well.

5dp6dt (4-9-11)

I want to test today but I’m not going to.  That bump is there so I know that I will get a positive HPT but the bump is not very big so I’m afraid it will be another chemical pg.  Staying off the computer for the rest of the day or I will spend it researching stupid questions. 

6dp6dt (4-10-11)

Barely positive HPT but bump has gone down significantly over night which most likely means chemical pregnancy.  Boobs no longer ache and the nausea I felt for a day is gone.  Off to try and occupy myself.

7dp6dt (4-11-11)

Positive HPT but barely.  A little darker than yesterday but not by much.  Just called the Dr to get my beta moved up so I can get this over with.  Next cycle we will be doing all my fun and exciting tests all over again.  Sono-hystogram, HSG, endometrial biopsy, then on to a third IVF.  So much fucking fun!!   Oh and I get to enjoy all the wonderful talk around the office about my boss and his new grandson.  Even better.

Need I say more.

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