Is it bad……

Is it bad that I am blatantly ignoring a friend who is pregnant?  Background: she knows we been struggling since the beginning, she was the first to send me a gift once I told her we were finally pregnant after IVF and she knows we lost our son.  So, about a month ago  she texted and told me she was pregnant.  Now the best way to go about telling an IF’er you are pregnant is tough but the way she did it really rubbed me the wrong way.  Ok lets face it, anyone who gets pregnant and tries to tell me will rub me the wrong way.  But she said,  “Hey there, congrats for me and J, we are expecting!!!  So how are you?”.  I’ll tell you how I am, take your news and shove it!  Ok I didn’t say that but instead I ignored the text and pretended I didn’t get it.  Real mature right?  Well she texted me again today and I know this time I have to respond.  One can usually get away with ignoring one text but after that it’s kinda hard to say “Oh you texted me?  Really?  Cus I didn’t get it.”  Yeah right.  It’s not that I’m not happy for her, she deserves the best and is very nice, it’s just that I’m sick of congratulating everyone else.  See other post (3 years, 3 months and 19 days, now 26) Selfish, I know.  I’m like a child who wants candy and is being told no.  So I know if I text her back, inevitably it will turn to her being pregnant and with the birth of my twin nephews this week, I’ve had enough.  I was already feeling sorry for myself this morning and counting again in my head and thinking that even if I do get pregnant this month, my nephews will be 10 months old before I even have a baby.  And that’s if the FET even works!  So chances are, I won’t even have a child before they are one at this point.  Crap I hate this!  So far I’ve been lucky and haven’t lost any friends despite me isolating many of them but one has to wonder how long they are going to put up with me before they do decide to move on.  No matter how tough my situation is.  Well here it goes, I’ll just get the conversation over with and maybe blog about it later.  Who knows, maybe it won’t be as bad as I’m making it out to be.

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One response to “Is it bad……

  1. No it’s not bad, I would probably do the same in your shoes, and she is being really insensitive given she know’s your situation, that’s doubly bad on her part. So feel free to ignore away, if you are feeling bad, could you text her back saying congratulations, but just leave it at that and not get sucked into it, as it can be really hard around baby talk.
    I now try not to count and play the what if’s game, cos it just causes mental pain.

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